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Defense Mechanisms Intellectualizing, Rationalizing, Cockiness, Justifying, Explaining, Analyzing   In my ongoing series of posts featuring the defense mechanisms used by persons with a substance use disorder (SUD), we've covered: Passive/mild styles: Denying, Lying, Silence, Withdrawing Dismissive techniques: Minimizing, Humor, Compliance Aggressive tools: Manipulating, Accusing, Judging, Projecting and Threatening, Blaming, Shouting, Defiance Today, we'll consider the cerebral set. These are common...[ read more ]

Defense Mechanisms Threatening, Blaming, Shouting, Defiance This is the next in my series on Defense Mechanisms used in substance use disorder**: drug, alcoholism, or behavioral (also known as process) addiction. Defense mechanisms are the behaviors that persons with a SUD use to protect their use by keeping those close to them away. These methods can be passive, aggressive, cooperative, or...[ read more ]

Parents, Teens, and Drinking It’s not uncommon for parents to adopt the perspective that they can teach responsible drinking by allowing supervised drinking at home, usually at the dinner table. I’ve been deeply concerned about this, but now there is meta-research supporting my concern.  The perceived logic is understandable: We’ll allow our teen to drink at home, under our supervision...[ read more ]

What To Do When Your Family Member Comes Home From Substance Abuse Treatment Welcoming a family member home after substance abuse** treatment is an emotionally charged time. Family members are usually excited, encouraged, and hopeful. They are also usually hesitant, guarded, and uncertain. Use my 6-point checklist below to help guide your decisions and interactions in the early days and...[ read more ]

Show Me The Money Money is not talked about nearly enough in the recovery community. That’s unfortunate; it is one of the areas that can have a significant impact on the quality of sobriety, happiness, and personal growth and integrity.   It’s common for persons with the a substance use disorder** to have had a damaged, dishonest, and dangerous relationship with...[ read more ]

3 Talking Points To Help Your Kid Understand Substance Abuse  It's complicated living with people who have a substance use disorder (SUD). To be honest, it doesn't get less complicated when that person is in recovery. It gets even more challenging with young family members who are able to understand and observe the patterns of behavior that go with a...[ read more ]

What They Say About People Who Abuse Substances  “They have to want it.”  “It will only work if they are ready.”  “You have to let them hit rock bottom.”  These are common sayings in 12-Step meetings, in recovery communities, by family members and friends. It’s even sometimes (unfortunately) said in professional treatment. To be fair, it’s said out of love...[ read more ]